When you meet someone, or see a stranger while out and about, you may find yourself instantly triggered. Maybe you feel drawn to them or experience a familiar feeling and form a friendship or relationship. It may seem as if there’s something smoldering and you can’t quite put your finger on it. After a period of time something said or done may rub you the wrong way. It’s passed over or maybe they planted a seed or spark that starts to grow and spread through your mind and body. That spark, given enough breath and fuel through disagreements, may ignite a fire within you and the sparring starts. Eventually over time, you find yourself beginning to pick that individual apart. You no longer see only the good qualities. The list of what you begin to accumulate adds up and you’re constantly triggered to the point you can’t be around that person any longer.
It can be tough to live in your own skin when you start identifying it all, can’t it?
If you’re not at a point where you’re asking yourself why the things you’ve started to see bother you, I invite you to start looking within. You may start to find the answers when you take a good hard look and find those same qualities in yourself or themes in your life. Where have you experienced this before? Instead of creating that mental list of things about people, get yourself a journal or notepad. You may not know where to start but may I suggest starting with that list? Put that list onto paper where you can see it. Take one at a time and write about one of those topics or qualities that bother you. How frequently do you see it surface and who are you with or where are you when you see it? Eventually you may see some of that in yourself. That may not always be the case but more than likely you may start to see where it has been showing up. After you start to see it ask yourself: when did this start? Where could this have first surfaced in my life? Each item in that list may take you down a different part of yourself and road your life. Ask yourself how this has played a role in your development into who you are today, how it framed your outlook on life, situations and people. How has it affected how you either choose to act or react to those themes in your life when they present themselves?
This work takes dedication. It took you a lifetime to get where you are at now so the work won’t be finished overnight. This is where you start moving from living on autopilot to living consciously and being informed of who you truely are and why you behave and think the way you do. I know you’ve asked yourself the why question, you know, why am I here? What’s my purpose? You may just find the answers to your questions in this work.
We all want to be seen in the best light and the best version of ourselves and what we have to offer to others. Ask yourself, if everyone wants this for themselves, why do we not extend the same consideration to others? Some people walk around in judgement pointing out every perceived negativity they see in others without looking at themselves. It’s so much easier to project all that negativity onto others than to work on themselves.You may view what you see as a negative trait, behavior etc., but that’s your perception. I’ve got news for you, not everything you identify is negative as it’s serving a purpose for them, you, and possibly others. It’s their life and choice in who they want to be.
Everyone has just as many beautiful qualities and gifts to offer. What would happen if instead of pointing out what needs equally addressed in our lives, we grabbed a journal to add to our list then identify the perfections in others? Imagine the bonds and the positive relationships we could build in our lives in this way.
Some of you may have heard that the way we treat others is a reflection of how we view and treat ourselves. The more you tear down others, the more you tear yourselves down. You cannot build yourself up in this way, though you may try. If you try this, the result may feel hollow and will consistently need fed through the continued tearing down of others. The only thing you may build up is your ego. That negativity will take so much work and energy to continue to fuel it and it will wear you down like using up the charge in a battery. On the other hand, by complimenting others, seeing their strengths and gifts and helping them find their beauty, you help build them up and elevate yourself in the process. Instead of creating self-directed anger and loathing, your heart will begin to open and you will find more love for yourself, charge up your battery, and keeping it charged. You will open to periods of bliss, euphoria and joy finding yourself and creating love and happiness within yourself.
Grab your pen and paper and get started. You will be on your path with every stroke of ink on that paper and every light you shine on yourself along the way.
Spiritual Enlightenment isn’t necessarily about being one with the universe and all-knowing about it and the meaning of life. It may just be about becoming one with yourself and all-knowing about yourself. Self-enlightenment leads to soul growth where spiritual enlightenment is attained.
Originally posted 09/05/2022